Dildo duck weirdness

Marundah Mail: Hey! Look at that lovely black duc....AAAAAAARGH!

Won't anyone think of the kiddiewinks?

Spotter's Badge: Karla

Alien abduction weirdness

Northern Echo: Man caught breaking into pensioners' porch 'was trying to escape from aliens'

"When the issue of compensation was mentioned, Mr Moroney spoke out again to say he would be unable to pay for the £150-worth of damage caused. He claimed his only source of income came from occasional work as a mobile stripper."

Spotter's Badge: Greg

Drunken lunatic weirdness

Peterborough Today: Who hasn't got drunk on a night out and passed out on the glass roof of the local shopping centre?

Admit it, we've all been there.

Spotter's Badge: Stuart

Hospital cat weirdness

Epping Forest Guardian: Cat spotted checking into A&E

"Yeah, I woke up this morning and I was a cat... are you listening to me?"

Spotter's Badge: Andrew

Swan v model boats weirdness

East Anglia Daily Times: Swan has personal grudge against model boat club

The last photo is a real tear-jerker

[Titanic music starts playing]

Spotter's Badge: Karl, Katie, Chris

Mythical creature weirdness

Cheknews.ca: Man chased through cemetery by knife-wielding unicorn

Right. OK.

Spotter's Badge: Darren

Giant badger weirdness

Gloucestershire Echo: Giant badger going through people's bins

Seen here actual size.

Spotter's Badge: Chris

Big cat wedding weirdness

Plymouth Herald: Couple's wedding at risk after lynx escapes from zoo

This is exactly what happened at the Herald picture desk:

"How big d'you reckon one of these cats is?"

"Ooooh, I'll just take a guess at... there"

"Nailed it. What about its shadow?"

"Lynx don't have shadows, IDIOT"

Spotter's Badge: Ed

Udder tampering weirdness

York Press: Udder-tampering scandal rocks Great Yorkshire Show

Did one of these people tamper with an udder? We will never know.

Spotter's Badge: George, Everybody

Harry Potter weirdness

Nottingham Post: Are these the best Harry Potter lookalikes in Britain?

No.

Spotter's Badge: Jon S

Ketchup weirdness

Cornish Guardian: Woman on mobility scooter is riding around Newquay squirting cars with tomato ketchup

Haven't we all?

Spotter's Badge: Candy

Mystery chair weirdness

Kent Online: Man finds chair

Is it a ducking stool? A prop for kinky sex acts? Or simply the one chair the DFS sale could never shift? WE SHALL NEVER KNOW

Spotter's Badge: Amanda

Shotgun weirdness

Coventry Telegraph: Genghis Khan admits to possession of shortened shotgun in Coventry

We blame Bill and Ted

Spotter's Badge: Everybody

Toilet roll weirdness

Aberdeen Evening Express: World shortage of shiny white loo roll causes panic at World Comb and Paper Championships

Oh, the humanity

Toilet paper weirdness

Edinburgh Evening News: Woman allegedly assaulted partner with toilet roll

Worse --- the paper is hung THE WRONG WAY ROUND.

Spotter's Badge: Richard